Tuesday, 7 February 2012
Saturday, 4 February 2012
Friday, 20 January 2012
Transcript of Rebecca questioning Noyale on her digital identity:
I’d like you to describe yourself to me
Pause. I’m not very tall but I’m not very small. I’m ill. My head is quite ... fizzy. Um ... I like to live in the city. Urr. I like ... not living in the city. I like living in the city, but I like not living in the city? Um. I’m an artist. I’m a mother. I’m a girlfriend. I’m a wife. I’m a granddaughter. I’m a daughter. I’m a sister. I’m a friend. Pause. I feel very different. Pause. I’m self conscious. And I’m in pain.
What does your online presence look like?
Look like? It looks like. Ur. White. White background. Pause. Thats... page ... and a body from another time. A line. More lines. A click of a button. An area of a picture. Pause.
When do you use digital technology?
Where do you use digital technology?
Everywhere. Urrr. Everywhere, on the train, home, the office, rarely in the studio, but sometimes. In bed. Kitchen. In the car. Pause.
How do you use digital technology?
With my fingers. With my hand, my fingers. Sitting or standing. Walking (walks). With my eyes. With my ears. Lying. (Sits down on floor). I think I use it too much. Sometimes, too much.
Transcript of Noyale questioning Rebecca on her digital identity:
Could you describe your online profile?
Um. I have a website, now. Its incomplete. I didn’t want to have one for a long time but now it feels necessary, I’m still not sure about it and I haven’t told anyone about it apart from people who are in it. I have a page on different social networks like facebook, linkedin , academia.edu, National Theatre Wales community and ... a ... a blog called we perform research. Um, a facebook company profile. A blog, several blogs, not public, maybe 3 or 4, discussing collaboration. So quite a big online presence. Plus traces from the past from various site. Comments I might have made on public forums, or records of performances I’ve been in, or conferences I’ve been to. Images from that, or reviews of my work. Um, so, if you looked me up online you would be able to find out quite a lot of information about me; where I live, maybe you could work out my age, see what I looked like. I’m quite careful and private. For example, with facebook my privacy settings are really high, and only friends can see my profile, but just contacts cant, they can see my very limited profile. I don’t like people writing on my facebook wall because I’d rather they messaged me privately. Um. And then after a while I delete things so they only stay present for a while. Sometimes I delete comments I’ve made in other places, because its feels like its past, and I don’t want a record to still be there. Um. But I like it, its nice to click a button and see people and see how they are, and make contact when you are feeling a bit isolated sometimes. And when there was the disaster in Japan last year it was really good because I could immediately see, send messages and say are you ok? And my friends said I’m ok. This is what’s happening. I felt like I had a sense of what was happening through that.
My website is, presents a certain image of me. I’ve thought about why I have it and who I want to look at it and what it’s there for. So it’s carefully edited, the image are carefully edited so I can come across in a certain way. I like it, it’s quite nostalgic looking at it. It reminds me of things I have done and I think ok I’ve done that. Um, it’s hard to remove yourself.... from somethings ... I hate that.
Can you describe your physical profile?
Your physical profile.
So by my physical profile I think you mean my ... physical profile in the flesh... so I’m small. 4 foot 11. When I’ve got shoes on. Otherwise I’m about 4 foot 10 and a half. Um. Slimish. But not thin. Um. Quite well proportioned. White. Pale. Blonde hair. Hair is frizzy or curly depending on if I’m by the sea or in a city. Dark eyebrows, sharp bone structure. Pointy nose, small lips. Green blue eyes depending on the light, but brown speckles. Um. Small feet. 3 and a half. My weight changes depending on how strong I am and what time of the month it is. Around 7 stone. If I entered a room I think my physical presence would be quite small. I don’t think ... because I’m quite reserved I don’t think I have a strong physical presence. So I feel a bit, invisible I suppose. But I think... mmmm... that version of me would be different. But I don’t feel invisible, I feel quite big (spreads arms) and my family would say I’m quite loud, and my partner would say I talk too much. (Moves hands) I’m probably the loudest in my family, the entertainer, the joker, the one who fills in the silences. So, my profile is quite big. I like to keep everyone together and keep the peace. Pause. Um, my physical profile in terms of ... I’m an artist, a writer, a researcher ... wife, partner, friend, daughter, sister, future mother maybe ... I ... I’m a dancer, an actor, a performer. A thinker, a reader. I write poetry sometimes. A gardener, philosopher, vegan activist...sometimes. I like the sea and open spaces and big skies, and ... I like the city. I like sitting in cafes on my own in the city and watching people, and I like to walk away from it all and come back to the sea. I like to be on my own. But I like to be with people too. And ... I’m 31. And I, I like living in Wales, but I don’t feel Welsh, whatever that means. Physical presence? Pause.
Profile. Physical profile. My physical profile in terms of traces. If I disappeared what would remain? There’s quite a lot of medical records. I’ve been quite ill. I had bad childhood asthma and nearly didn’t survive. So throughout my childhood I was in and out of hospital, so there will alot of medical records and I’ll always have some kind of medical complaint. Whether it be my neck or my asthma or something else. Physical profile here in this community, in Aberystwyth. People see people when they are around, they might not know you, but you know that 'that’s that person that walks up and down the seafront in the evenings' or something like this.
Describe your homepage
My homepage. It looks simple, I have a ... (gestures) webpage with different sections: about me, gallery, projects, teaching and contact, I think. And only two of the pages are finished. And that’s the gallery and about me. So the others say ‘under construction’. Waiting until I see what I want to say about myself. Um. The gallery [points toes and moves leg around] has got some images spanning back through time, so it stays with the most recent and goes back to about 2003 [gestures]. Alot of it is work with Kaitaisha so the images are quite dark, but other projects, like the ones in the environment are nice and bright images. Images of people moving in space, and theatre spaces. ... Some images I wanted to find but I couldn’t find them so they are not there which is a shame. ....
Can you describe your home?
My home? Um. [looks at feet]. I think of my parents home and my home with my husband as my two homes because I go to my parents home alot. So, my home. [Starts to move in space as if in home] like this as you enter [gestures throughout as if pointing to what she is describing]. You have the coats here, the chest of draws, the kitchen, in the kitchen; the cooker, the sink, the microwave, the kettle, the table – the table was my grandmas – and the chairs – I always see myself sat around it at my grandmas, the window and the net curtains, and the seaview. Sometimes when you have that nice winter light, the net curtains cast a shadow across the wall, and it moves in the wind and its really beautiful. Then you come out of the kitchen in to the hall, it’s a small space. The lounge, the sofa there, the chairs, my desk, Pauls paintings, family photos, books – lots of books – about 800 books. The window, big sea view. Then, the hallway, bathroom, I see things that irritate me in the bathroom, some damp, it’s always dirty. Then the bedroom, bed. New bed. Pauls desk, which is also a sewing machine that was my grandmas, my other grandmas. When you open it it smells like her. His computer. Big chest of drawers, a dresser, and that was my other grandmas, and again I can just see that in her dining room in her house, and used to be just covered in stuff. A chest of drawers that was my grandpas, I painted it white. Windows, curtain, wardrobe. That’s my house by the sea. My parents house is my home in the sense that I feel at home there, I still have some things there, not many, but I keep pyjamas there. So yeah. Up the driveway, it’s a 1930’s house. Porch, sliding doors, enter, hallways, staircase, upstairs, small bathroom, my parents bedroom, the room that I sleep in when I stay. Single bed, sofa bed. Then small bedroom that has a small bed in. Downstairs, door in front of you – lounge, dining room, kitchen – small kitchen. And lots of memories. Lots of pictures of me as a child. Its quite dark, there is usually someone around. And. I mean I learned to walk in that house I was bathing my nieces in the bath a few weeks ago and they are the same age as me and my sister, the same age apart – 22 months and we bathed in that bath at the same age, and it’s really strange to think of that history repeating again. Garden out the back, two sheds, lots of old things.
Sunday, 15 January 2012
Bauman, however, reminds us that although we may think we are free, we are actually obliged to engage in this process of continual reinvention because our social lives are in continual flux. Furthermore, many identities are not rooted in the local, the social or the political, they are much more floating and transient, based on fashion, music, and interests, and Bauman interprets many of these strategies as an attempt by individuals to try and escape from a world over which they have no control.
Following Joseph Brodsky, Bauman is rather scathing of the range of shallow strategies many of us adopt to escape from the world, and ultimately argues that they are all pointless....
"you may take up changing jobs, residence, company, country, climate, you may take up promiscuity, alcohol, travel, cooking lessons, drugs, psychoanalysis.... In fact you may lump all these together and for a while that may work. Until the day, of course, when you wake up in your bedroom amid a new family and a different wallpaper, in a different state and climate, yet with the same stale feeling toward the light of day pouring through your window." (105)
Bauman seams to be arguing that individuals will never find peace of mind, never find `who they really are' unless they have stability and security, and in order to have that, people need to root themselves in local and national institutions, otherwise, our attempts to find ourselves through the reinvention of the self will always be less than satisfactory.
Noyale to Rebecca
Describe your online profile
Incomplete...not sure...unnecessary...big online presence...traces....records...images...reviews...where I live...my age...how I look like...private...I delete past...I like it....make contact....Japan....immediate sense of what is happening...carefully edited...nostalgic...remembering....try to delete myself...I hate
Describe your physical profile
Flesh...small....4''11...slimish but not thin...well proportioned...white...pale...curly...structures...pointy nose...dependable....sharp bones structures....changeable weight...7 stones...small physical presence...invisible....I feel quite big...quite loud...the loudness of my family...I talk too much...I like everyone at peace together at peace...I am artist....writer...researcher...wife...partner...daughter...future mother...a dancer...an actor...a thinker...a reader...a gardener....a philosopher...a vegan activist....I like the sea....I like to seat in cafes...I am 31....I was ill...traces of medical records.
Describe your homepage
Simple...different sections...under construction...unfinished...finished...gallery and about me...waiting to see what I want to say about myself...chronological...dark and bright...some images missing...
Describe your home
R walks through the imaginary parents home and marriage home
marriage home....gran-ma's table...myself as a child...4 pm winter light...curtain...small place...800 books...big sea view...irritation...damp...dirty floor...smells of gran-ma
Parent's home...pyjama...small 1930's...lots of memories...pictures of me as a child...dark...usually someone else...history repeated...garden..
We have then discussed the notion of displacement and territeriolisation in regard to not being able to print yourself in the space - this is related to the three space we have worked in PAF (france), New Cross studio and Aber I would also add Middlesex campus as well.
The future/past self of the online identity as a projection of the self but in the same time software like twitter are suppose to be about sharing immediacy - twitting someone about present to 1000 of people at once - multiplicity.
Monday, 9 January 2012
A (previous) movement
A (new) movement phrase of repeated gestures
A (self written) butoh fu (see documents of our scores for the butoh-fu's we used)
Francis Bacon 'The Base of Crucifixion' (1944)/'The Human Head' (1953)/
'Man with Dog' (1953)
Paula Rego 'Scavengers' (1994)/'Baying' (?)
Gericault 'Study for Raft of the Medusa' (?)
Texts: Dante 'The Inferno'/Kafka 'Metamorphosis'/Merleau Ponty 'Phenomenology of Perception/Choreographic Score Book/Hay 'My Body the Buddhist'/ Mary Oliver poetry.
Thinking (as Rotman describes) of the self as gestural, written, spoken and digital.
Thinking about the self and digital technology:
Notion of the self continuing after death online (the ghost)
New 'digital' words:
Presence - being able to be in several places at the same time (online identity).
Mapping the self on the site using masking tape to trace pathways. Saw that we cannot capture the complexity of the movement lines using the tape, or perhaps any means.
The post-humanistic body is more about 'self' than body.
'Mirroring' exercise observation:
In the film footage of this exercise (where Noyale is mirroring Rebecca) Rebecca is out of shot and you can only see Noyale. You cannot see that Noyale is mirroring me; watching this was an interesting experience of my 'self'. I can see that she recognises my physicality and is thus able to mirror me, equally, when mirroring her I can almost pre-empt what her movements might be. I recognise her. This can be looked at in relation to Rotmans notion that we have a 'better' sense of self through the multiplicity of self. But what about the interior life that Noyale cannot see in me? It is interesting that she can mirror my physical expression of my interior life, and yet she cannot access my interior life.
Walked on the seafront and balanced on the wind on the jetty. Took an improvisation around the body-wind jetty experience into the studio. Through the improvisation I sensed a shared internal life (as opposed to the mirroring experience), which created quite a different sense to when we stepped in and out of eachothers solos. The experience of the wind externded into the space as an environment.
Online identity as less physical and more verbal. A self-reflective exercise in terms of our own digital identity.
Questions Rebecca asked Noyale:
Describe yourself to me
What does your online presence look like?
What does your website look like?
Where do you use digital technology?
How do you use digital technology?